But by Wednesday it was time to go home and that's when it hit me – I was a mother. I was the one she'd look to to feed, change, clothe and otherwise take care of her for the rest of her life – or at least the next 18 years. I was supposed to know what I was doing.

The enormity of the situation weighed so heavily on my mind that I could barely sleep (which actually wasn't all that much of a problem since I wasn't getting much opportunity to sleep, anyhow). But between my hormones waging warfare with my sanity, my determination to sterilize everything within a 5-mile radius of my baby's bassinet and an intense fear of going somewhere and leaving the baby behind, I was convinced I'd never relax again.

What I discovered, however, is that motherhood is as much about letting go as it is about keeping on top of things. And when I learned to let go, get help and give in to my own needs, things got better – much better.

Here are some of the strategies I used:

• Set aside a period of time – even if it's only 15 minutes – each day just for you. Read a magazine, have a cappuccino, sit on a park bench and watch people stroll by. Just don't do any housework.
• Sing to your baby.
• Buy a shower massage and take a long, hot shower.
• Set limits with people who pretend to be helpful, but really aren't. Examples: Your mother, who's sure the baby will sleep better on his tummy while you prefer to put him on his back, your sister-in-law who can't understand why you insist on breastfeeding, etc. Say, "I value your opinion, but what I need most right now is your support."
• Get a massage.
• Keep a journal. Write down your thoughts, fears and anxieties. The process of writing is therapeutic, plus it can help you clarify what you really need.
• Buy yourself fresh flowers.
• Spend time outdoors. Sunlight can be a mood-lifter. For the winter, invest in a full-spectrum light bulb, which imitates the sun's spectrum and can make you feel better indoors.
• Go to a pond and feed the ducks.
• Use an answering machine to screen calls and don't feel compelled to return every one. Record a message that says, "Life is pretty hectic right now. We'll do our best to call back before the baby goes to college." This is a funny, but clear way to let people know you can't get back to them right away.
• Call a supportive friend.
• Don't compare yourself to friends or their kids. Remember, what looks like perfection on the outside may not be so on the inside.
• Get online and connect with other new parents. You can pour out your frustration and get heartfelt support from parents who've been where you are now.
• Let other people do as much for you as possible. When friends offer to help, ask them to come over and bring dinner or to babysit.

Want to see more?

• Mommy's Day Out
• Now I've Had the Baby … Help! Your New Life
• You Deserve a Break Today: New Moms Need Nurturing, Too
• Talk about it!